Marry You (SwanQueen)
by The Flying Ostrich
Summary: SwanQueen. EmmaxRegina. Emma and Regina have been falling in love, unknown to each other (or even themselves). When Regina suddenly announces her engagement to Robin Hood, Emma must learn to except and deal with her feelings for the formal Evil Queen. And whatever she decides to do, she must act fast. After all, there are only seven days until the wedding...
1. Prologue

Prologue~

Emma Swan was, yet again, running. She had been a runner her entire life. Whenever anything got too difficult, too hard, too complicated, she ran away. She didn't face it when it was so much easier to avoid it altogether.

But she couldn't avoid this. _This problem_ was everywhere.

 _This problem_ was in the smell of the fragrant apple blossoms that floated through the chilly spring air.

 _This problem_ was in the sound of high heels click-clacking down the grey pavement that lined the streets of Storybrooke.

 _This problem_ was in the thoughts that reminded Emma during every waking moment how much she needed this one particular woman in her life.

 _This problem_ was the fact that she had finally realized that she was in love with Regina Mills.

 ** _But it was too late now,_** she reminded herself as tears pooled onto her white shirt and made sad little puddles on the cloth. She looked down at the pools and reflected how her shirt was now stained with her sorrow. If only she would have realized it sooner. Of course an idiot like herself wouldn't have figured it out until _a week before Regina's wedding._ Damn it.

She had realized that she loved Regina. She had realized that she needed Regina. She realized that she would never be happy without Regina. But she had also decided that _Regina_ would never be happy if Emma told her the truth. Regina was already getting her happy ending by marrying Robin. That's why Emma was going to step out of the picture. She loved Regina enough to let her go.

She was leaning against her yellow bug, letting it support her weight for fear her knees would fail her. Her eyes and throat stung with tears and she was contemplating running. If she ran, she wouldn't have to deal with this anymore. Any of it; The unbearable longing she felt whenever she laid eyes on Regina. The pain that was like someone digging in a rake and dragging it through her stomach when she saw the happy couple together. The jolt of happiness she felt when Regina walked into a room…. because that happiness only faded to sorrow, guilt, and pain when she realized Regina was getting married and would be out of her reach forever in just a few short days.

Emma turned around, looking back at the diner she had just left. There were several people inside of Granny's. In fact, almost the entire town was there for pre-celebrations concerning the wedding. She heard a roar of laughter and pain flared through her heart. She couldn't leave this town. In her whole life, Storybrooke was the only place that had ever felt like home. She had made a habit of leaving a place before she could get too attached to it. It was too late this time. She couldn't start over again.

As she wiped her wet face on the sleeve of her sweater and walked back up the path to the diner, she made a silent vow to herself to let Regina go. She couldn't let her feelings get in the way.

What she didn't know was how hard that vow was going to be to keep.


	2. Chapter 1

_7 Days Before the Wedding~_

Coming back home to Storybrooke did something to me. When I turned around the corner and saw the familiar clock tower standing guard over the town, everything changed. Tears brimmed my eyes a little. I had been so scared I would never see this again.

It had been three months since I had been out of Storybrooke. I'd been on a top-secret solo mission to defeat an enemy that had all our happy endings on the brink of destruction. And of course by top-secret I mean that the entire town knew about it.

It had taken three months, but the villain was finally destroyed, and I was back home.

 _Home._

I never thought I would ever be able to call anything that.

But that's precisely what Storybrooke is. The buildings; they are home. The streets; they are home. The sights, the sounds, the smells; they are home. The people; they are home.

And I am so glad to be back.

I pull up to Granny's diner, pulling the key out of the ignition and letting out a heavy, content, bittersweet sigh. There's lights on in the diner, and I can hear the voices of everyone in town inside.

My boots make a lovely, familiar _thud thud thud_ on the pavement that leads up to the door, and as the sound of my steps escalate, so does the sound of my beating heart.

Everything is aching. I ache to see the people I missed for so long. Mary Margaret. David. Henry. Regina. The last name pops into my head before I can stop it. Before I can even think about it. Thinking about Regina is so natural, so instinctive. I have tried for so long to be her enemy, to hate her, but I can't. I know in my heart that she isn't my enemy and that I sure as hell don't hate her.

I yank open the door, and the sound of the shouts of everyone welcoming me home is deafening. They say three simple words—"Welcome home, Emma!"—but they mean so much more. I can hear in that moment that they mean "we missed you!" and "we love you!" and "we're so grateful that you're alive".

It's overwhelming.

But it all fades away as soon as I see _her._

My heart jumps into my throat, lodging there in an awkward lump and making it difficult to breath.

Ebony hair.

Deep, soulful eyes.

Blood-red lips.

Has she always been so damn beautiful? She seemed to be all I could think about those three months I was away, and yet my memories never did her justice. They never gave her body enough curve. Never gave her eyes enough emotion. Never gave her face enough beauty.

And they never, ever made me feel the way I'm feeling right now.

Our eyes meet and the world melts away. All I want to do is run to her. I want to tell her that I missed her, and that I was scared I'd never see her again, and that there are so many things I want to say.

But I'm stopped by dozens of pairs of arms grabbing me and surrounding me and welcoming me home.

My parents reach me first of course, crying and hugging me and telling me how grateful they are that I'm back. And then it's me crying and squeezing Henry. And then it's everyone else in the diner. And then it's an awkward silence as I meet Regina's gaze again.

Her eyes are deep when she says, "Welcome back Swan." I can hear the unsaid things behind her words.

I smile softly. "Thanks Regina." I hope she can hear the unsaid things behind mine.

There's food and drinks and cake and people and talking and catching up, and finally Mary Margaret makes her way back over to me.

"Come here, there's something I need to tell you!"

She leads me over the corner where Regina is standing awkwardly by herself. An anger flares up inside of me. Will no one talk to her, even after all this time? Have they really not seen the change that's taken place in her?

"Regina!" Mary Margaret calls, leading me over to her. "Regina, tell Emma your exciting news!"

The mayor stiffens slightly, avoiding my gaze and looking instead at the ground. She's fidgeting with a ring on her left finger. It takes me a long moment to realize what it is. And then finally, with horror, I do.

Mary Margaret can't contain herself any longer. "She's engaged!" she gushes. "Isn't it wonderful? Regina is getting married!"

Something aching and writhing and loathing begins to wriggle in my stomach and I can't get it to go away. It's horror and shock and surprise, but it's also something else. It's jealousy. So much is going on in my head that complete thoughts simply aren't processing.

I can tell by the look on my mother's face that I'm supposed to say something.

I stumble over my words. Choke on them. "Regina—that's, that's great!" I try with great effort to make the words sound genuine, but they come out flat. She still won't meet my eyes.

"When did this happen?" I ask. The words sound rushed, panicked.

"Two months ago," says Mary Margaret proudly.

"And I assume it's with Robin?" My mother nods proudly to answer my question. I look to Regina, but she's still motionless. Why is she acting so strange? Isn't she supposed to be happy? It's her engagement, after all.

"Guess what the best part is, Emma?" My mother gushes. "The wedding is only a week away!"

The horror is rising in my throat, and I can feel tears forming. _It's just exhaustion,_ I tell myself. But I know that it's so much more than that. I'm about to scream or cry or do anything to make this awful feeling go away, so I mutter something—probably a congratulation or perhaps an excuse of why I'm leaving—and then hurry to get up and leave.

I rush outside, the bitter Maine air both taunting me and comforting me. I let myself collapse against the hard metal frame of my bug, not trusting my legs to support me.

I close my eyes, letting the tears form before they rain down my cheeks and pool onto my shirt. I let out a sob before I finally face the thought that has been bothering me for so long.

Of course I'm in love with Regina.

When I saw that ring on her finger, it was like a revelation. My life flashed before my eyes, and all the seconds I've ever spent with her, all the moments I tried to hate her and wasn't able to, all the times I realized that she was a good remarkable person under the surface, flashed through my head. It was like I was living them again, only this time I realized what they all meant. Everything—every thought, every breath, every heart beat I had had since I met Regina all led up to the inevitable fact that I had been falling in love with her.

But I was a coward. I had been too scared. Too scared to tell her. Too scared to lose her. Too scared to admit it to myself.

And now—now that I had finally admitted it—now it was too late.

Regina was gone from me. Gone forever. Still in sight, but too far to reach.

The only woman I had ever truly fallen in love with was falling out of my hands like sand. And like sand, I knew there was no way I was ever going to stop her from leaving me forever.


	3. Chapter 2

_Regina's POV—_

People are going to tell you who you are your whole life. And someone told me once that you just have to punch back and say "No, _this_ is who I am".

But that's so hard when _I_ don't even know who I am.

I've never known.

I've never been one person, I've always been two entities struggling against each other in the body of one person.

There's the young girl full of light and love and hope who aims to destroy the demons that live within her.

And then there's the woman who embraces them. Who lets her rage and heartbreak and sorrow and longing take over her and rip through her and destroy her and embraces the darkness that lets her demons empower her.

Those are the two people that struggle within me. For a long time I was the first person, and for a longer time I was the second.

And who am I now?

I am Regina Mills. I am the Mayor of Storybrooke. I am the mother of Henry. I am the Evil Queen trapped in a new land. I am the maiden that loved riding horses. I am the broken woman trapped between her two lives. The woman with a blackened heart and an enlightened soul. The woman whose dark and light are fighting within her, ripping her apart and making her so broken that the simple act of existing causes her pain.

The pain is unbearable at times, and there are moments that I don't know how I'm going to keep living.

Henry helped for a while. He was something I could pour my love and light into.

But that's been getting harder as he's been slowly slipping out of my reach.

As I watched him leave my life, the pain became unbearable again, and I wondered if the battle was worth it. Should I keep choosing between good and bad? Should I keep struggling to be light? Or should I just give up. Cease to fight. Cease to exist. No one needed me. The only person I had ever loved in this world had found a new mother, someone new to give his needs to.

But then I found someone. Not someone that needed me, but someone that I needed. Someone that made the fight worth it. Someone that I wanted to pour my light and love into again. Someone that made existing hurt a little less, someone that made life seem to be worth living again.

Her name was Emma Swan.

And as much as she helped me, she made me hurt too.

She helped me by making my heart beat again.

She filled me up with what I had been missing for so long—love.

And that felt amazing.

But it was also painful. Because how could she ever love me the same way?

Emma is the Savior. I'm the Evil Queen.

She's light. I'm dark.

She's the hero. I'm the villain.

I am a monster. I tore her apart from her family. I ripped her away from love and hope and home and took her to a place where her whole life consisted of fear.

She could never love me. Why would she ever love someone like me?

I'm a monster. No one could ever love a creature like me.

So I decided to move on.

Emma went away for three months, and in the time she was away, I thought that maybe I could forget about her. But it ended up that I thought about her more when she _wasn't_ there than when she was.

I didn't need to stop thinking about her, I just needed something (some _one_ ) to distract me from thinking about her.

I was so relieved when Tinker Belle told me that Robin Hood was my true love. This _proved_ that Emma and I weren't supposed to be together. This meant that I had to get over her. It gave me a reason to move on.

I was so happy for that short time. I thought I had found love again, love that was recipitated.

I thought that I had done a proper job of moving on and forgetting Emma. That had just been a phase, I told myself. Emma wasn't love. It was infatuation. What I had with Robin, _that_ was love.

But the more I repeated those words to myself, the more forced they felt.

When Robin proposed, I was the happiest woman alive.

But happiness is fleeting.

Because when Emma walked through the doors of Granny's and her bright green eyes met mine, everything inside me came tumbling down.

Everything that I had worked so hard to build with Robin was destroyed by a single glance shared with Emma.

It made me realize that things built up around lies are easily destroyed. There will come a time in everyone's life where everything they thought they knew is proven otherwise, and the only things that remain are the things that are true. That's what happened in that moment for me. Everything I had with Robin melted away, replaced by the love for Emma I'd been denying myself for so many years.

That glance let me into her soul. It let our souls connect in a way. In a way that I never felt with Robin. Robin loved me, but Emma understood me. Maybe she could never love me, but I know that she understands me. She gets me. And perhaps that's enough. As long as she keeps understanding me, that is all I need.

Unfortunately, I'm trapped now. Trapped once again between two forces pulling me in different directions. Trapped between the man I thought I loved, and the woman I know I do.


	4. Chapter 3

_6 Days Before the Wedding~_

 _Regina's POV~_

The street is almost empty, so I'm caught off guard when I bump into someone. My thin heels make me topple over, but two strong hands around my wrists stop me from colliding with the pavement.

I look up to meet the eyes of my savior, and as I see that they're sparkling and green, I realize that they're the eyes of _the_ Savior.

 _Shit._

Her face is mere inches from mine and I can smell the cinnamon scent that always envelopes her body.

It hurts. This hurts. The ache of how much I love her hurts. What hurts even more though, is the throbbing pain reminding me that she'll never want me the way I want her.

But in this moment with our faces so close, her hands almost intertwined with mine to stop me from falling, her eyes roving over my face, I can almost imagine that she does.

Her eyes seem distant and deep, thinking thoughts on some far away planet as they explore my face. I feel a blush creeping up my neck and pray that she doesn't notice.

She clears her throat uncomfortably and places me back on my feet, stepping back suddenly, avoiding my gaze.

I mumble an apology, and she looks up at me, completely surprised.

"You're not gonna tell me to get out of your way?" She teases.

"You could never be in my way."

We both just stare at each other.

My face goes beet red. That was probably _the_ stupidest thing I could have possibly said. The silence is more painful than my embarrassment.

She shuffles her feet, slamming her hands into her pockets and finally breaks the silence. "Hey," she starts awkwardly, "uhm, I think I forgot to congratulate you yesterday."

Now I'm the one to look down.

"I'm really happy for you," she says. She doesn't sound happy. But perhaps that's because I don't want her to sound happy about it.

"Are you?" it comes out of my mouth before I can stop it. "You didn't seem happy about it yesterday." Even I can hear the hope in my voice.

Her bright eyes meet mine. "Regina," She says it softly, but the word is powerful. "Your happiness is all I care about. Your happiness is what makes me happy."

I don't say anything, so she speaks again. "You _are_ happy…. Aren't you?"

Am I happy? I don't know how to respond. I thought I was. When Robin proposed I was. But I can't be happy. Not if the person at the end of the aisle isn't Emma at my wedding.

I don't want her to worry about me, so I just tell her, "Of course I am. I love Robin."

And I think I see her face fall.


	5. Chapter 4

_5 Days Before the Wedding~_

 _Emma's POV~_

I guess I read the signs wrong. When we were at the diner, the way she acted seemed off. Something was wrong—I couldn't just tell, I thought I could _feel_ it.

I thought that it meant that maybe I had a chance. That maybe she was having doubts about marrying Robin. And that maybe she did in fact return my feelings.

That's why a day ago I decided to walk to her house.

I didn't know exactly why I was headed there. Or what I would say after she opened the door.

All I knew is that I needed to go there. I needed to see if I had a chance. Because if I let her marry Robin without saying anything when there was a chance—even just a slight _chance—_ that she loved me back, I would regret it for the rest of my life because I know in my heart that Regina is my only shot at real happiness.

But obviously, I won't ever get that happiness.

 _She said she was happy,_ I remind myself for the thousandth time. _She said she loved him._

Every time I repeat those words to myself, it feels like someone rubbing salt over my aching heart.

I'm at the table with Mary Margaret, looking over twenty open books about flowers and venues and dresses. I don't know what happened to make my mother and Regina friends since I've been gone, but Mary Margaret is suddenly her wedding planner. And somehow I've become her assistant.

Frankly, the last thing I want to do is pick out what flowers the woman I'm certain is my true love will be holding as she unites herself with someone else, so I can't help but zone out everything Mary Margaret is saying.

"Emma, are you okay?" It's the first time in hours any of her words have registered.

"What?"

"Are you alright? You seem off. Is something wrong?"

I look over the books on the table and feel a pang in my chest when I see a picture of a bride that looks shockingly similar to Regina.

"No. Nothing's wrong," I say. There's an edge in my voice I can't hide.

Mary Margaret reaches across the table, over the pamphlets and cut-outs and ripped out pages and booklets, and rests her hand on top of mine.

"Emma, we can talk about whatever it is that's obviously bothering you," she says.

I look up to meet her gaze, and I see the worry behind her eyes. She doesn't deserve to be made concerned like this.

"I don't know what to do." The weakness of my voice surprises me. It sounds like someone else talking. Someone small and broken.

"About what, sweetie?" She strokes my hand, and the gesture makes tears sting my throat. I close my fists into balls and press them into my eyes.

Mary Margaret leaves her chair to move to the one directly next to mine. She doesn't make me talk. Instead she just lets me cry, rubbing my back and stroking my hair as I bawl into her shirt.

I hate this. I hate being weak. I'm supposed to be strong. But at the same time, it is _such a relief_ to be with someone that doesn't expect me to be strong all the time.

"Mom, what do I do?" I finally whisper. I can feel her smile when I call her 'mom'.

"That depends on what it is you need help with."

I swallow hard. "What do you do when you're only chance at happiness is with someone that is already getting their happy ending? Do you sacrifice their happiness for your own?"

Mary Margaret is silent for a long time. She finally asks, "Well that depends. Do you love them?"

"Absolutely."

"Then if they're happy, shouldn't you be happy for them? If you really love them, their happiness will always seems most important."

"What if there's a chance that they aren't happy? What if there's a chance that they're just _saying_ they are?"

"Well," she leans down to kiss my forehead, "then you'll know what to do."

The baby starts crying, so she gets up to tend to it. She looks back before leaving the room.

"Don't worry, Emma. Love always finds a way."


	6. Chapter 5

_5 Days Before the Wedding~_

 _Emma's POV (later that night)_

I didn't want to go to this freaking party. In fact, it was probably the last thing in the entire _world_ that I wanted to do after the kind of day I had had.

I had been sitting at a table, looking through pamphlets with my mother for over three hours until I felt like my brain was going to bleed out of my eye sockets, repeating the five words that broke my soul to myself over and over again to remind myself that Regina had said she loved Robin. To remind myself that there wasn't a chance for us. To remind myself that hoping was silly. To remind myself that holding on to hope would hurt a lot more than facing reality.

But facing reality is a lot easier when you can face it on the couch with a tub of ice cream and have _Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone_ playing on repeat than it is to face at a party with the entire town watching you.

Granny's is booming with lights and music and people. Ruby went to work jazzing the place up to make it some sort of club for a pre-wedding party. Pretty much everyone is here, and they're all spruced up in tight dresses and questionable makeup and busting moves on the dance floor that Napoleon Dynamite would envy.

Except me. I'm sitting in one of the booths, making sure that my back is pressed up as close to the wall as possible. I just want to disappear. I just want to get the hell out of here. I have actually tried to leave three times, only to be brought back in by Mary Margaret or David or some other "helpful" townfolk.

Watching people be happy when you feel like shit inside is probably one of the most painful experiences. Especially watching the two people causing you the pain be happy.

Regina and Robin are both here tonight. Together. Dancing. And laughing. And being happy. It makes my stomach churn. It makes my throat burn. It makes my heart hurt with such intensity that I have to squeeze my eyes closed and suck in a breath to remind myself that I'm still alive.

I have to keep reminding myself that she's happy. Regina deserves a happy ending. She deserves this. She deserves Robin. If Robin is truly what makes her happy, then I have to be happy for her.

Eventually, Robin has to leave. A couple of his buddies pull him out of Granny's for some "secret mission". Everyone knows that it's to buy his suit since he's been slacking off.

As soon as he leaves the smile that's been plastered on Regina's face all night fades away as quick as flicking off a light switch. She leaves the dance floor. And she goes to sit in a booth, pressing her hands into her eyes. She sits there for a long time, not moving or talking, and sometimes it looks like she's not even breathing.

But no one goes up to ask her if she's okay. It's funny to think that this whole party is for her, but no one seems to gives a shit about her. I wonder what I should do. If I should go up to her and ask her if she's alright, or if I should just pretend like nothing is wrong. But when I see that her shoulders begin to shake with what I guess are sobs, I know that I can't pretend. Something _is_ wrong. And I have to try and fix it.

"Hey," I say when I finally make it to her table. She can't hear me over the noise (I can hardly hear myself) so I repeat my words. Her head whips up immediately and her eyes fill with horror as she tries to cover the fact that she's been crying.

Seeing those tears in her eyes breaks me. I want to be able to help her. To take away the pain. To fix whatever it is that's bothering her. But I don't know what to do, so instead I stand there helplessly as she tries to nonchalantly wipe her eyes with a napkin.


	7. Chapter 6

_Regina's POV~_

I can't do this. I'm not sure I can do this anymore.

Pretending was so much easier when Emma wasn't here.

Because I realize now that that was what I was doing the entire time I have been with Robin. Pretending. Tricking myself. Putting on a performance.

And I can't do it anymore. Not with her watching me.

I'm breaking inside. I thought I'd finally found my happily ever after. I thought that Robin was my 'knight and shining armor' as they put it. I thought that I'd found my happy ending. I thought that if I pretended that I loved him for long enough, that maybe eventually I really would.

And now… now everything is upside-down.

I can't pretend any longer.

Not with her green eyes latching on to mine when I look at her.

Not with her blonde hair bouncing over her shoulders when she walks.

Not with her cinnamon scent enveloping me when she's near me.

Not with her standing at my booth when I'm the most vulnerable, her keen eyes searching my face and probably deducing all its secrets.

"You okay?" she asks me.

I look up at her with broken eyes. That's all I can do for an answer.

She slides into the booth so that she's sitting across from me and leans a little closer, taking in my pained expression.

"Regina," she says it so softly I can barely hear her over the blaring music. "What's wrong?"

My eyes well up with tears again as I try to search for words. What's wrong? _Everything. The fact that I'm marrying someone I don't love. The fact that I'm not marrying you. The fact that you'll never love me back._

"Regina," she says. "Look…. I know something is wrong. And I'm not going to leave until you tell me what it is. You've had my back, and I want you to know that I have yours."

She doesn't know how much her words mean to me. I let a brief smile creep upon my lips, and she smiles softly in return.

"Spill," she urges, nudging my foot under the table.

I look down at my hands, still unsure what I want to say. How to say it.

It is silent for a very long time, and the silence between us almost blocks out the blaring music.

"Why are you marrying Robin?"

The question is sudden and unexpected and I start panicking. Why the hell is she asking me this?

"Because he's my true love…" my voice is small. Much smaller than I expected it to be. Her eyes study my face, searching it for lies. But I'm not lying. That _is_ why I'm marrying him. I'm marrying him because someone told me that he was my true love and I forced myself into believing it.

"Do you love him?" It comes out of Emma's mouth as a whisper.

I'm really panicking now. Because I'm not ready to answer these questions. I'm not ready to hear the answers. And I'm sure as hell not ready for Emma to know the truth.

"Miss Swan, I don't see why any of this is relevant—"

"It's relevant Regina because I care about you and I want to make sure that you're getting the happy ending that you deserve."

Her words bring more tears to my glistening eyes.

"That I _deserve?_ Emma, I don't _deserve_ any happy ending. Let me remind you who I am, because you seem to forget that I'm the person that ripped everyone's happy endings apart. I took you from your home and your family. I have _killed_ people Emma," my voice breaks and I'm scared that I'll start sobbing. "I've had to live with blood on my hands for years. _I am a monster. I am a villain. And villians don't get happy endings."_

The tears are streaming down my face and her eyes pierce into mine. She reaches across the table suddenly, taking my hand in hers.

"No," she says. I envy the strength and power in her voice. "That isn't who you are. That is who you _were._ You have changed, Regina. You're not a villain or a monster. Not anymore. You have put in so much effort in escaping your demons and becoming a better person. For yourself and for your son. If anyone deserves a happy ending, it's you."

 _Oh my god. She doesn't hate me. She doesn't think I'm a monster. What if…. What if there is a chance after all?_

I shake my head violently, trying to rid myself of my dangerous thoughts. Hope is the most deadly weapon of all.

I look back up at her, meeting her eyes and trying to say all my unsaid thoughts through our gaze. "Thank you, Emma. I don't understand why you've stuck by me after all the shit I've put you through."

"Because I—" she stops abruptly, eyes widening a bit. Composing herself, she finishes quickly, "Because like I said, you deserve to have a happy ending."

She clears her throat and starts again. "So tell me Regina, and answer me truthfully. Are you happy? Are you getting your happy ending?"

I study her face for a long moment before I finally decide to answer.

"I don't know anymore." My voice starts breaking again and I bite down hard on my lip. Her eyes soften, and she squeezes my hand. God how good her hand feels in mine. If I think about it too long, chills begin running up my arm, so I distract myself by studying her beautiful face, which only sends more chills up my skin.

"What if… what if I'm only marrying him because I thought I had to?" I whisper just loud enough to be heard over the surrounding ruckus. Because I was told that he was my true love, and I'm marrying him because I feel like I'm expected to? What if I'm only marrying him because I feel trapped and I'm scared to be alone?"

My eyes beg for hers to answer me.

"Regina, is there someone else you love?" Damn she's good.

I nod my head, biting back the tears. "Yes," I say breathily. "There is. But that must only be a phase right? If Robin is my true love, how could I possibly love anyone else?"

She rubs her thumb across my hand, and I have to concentrate very hard on what she's saying so that I don't miss the words.

"I don't believe that everyone only has only one true love, Regina. Love is shifting and changing and moving, just like people. As people grow and change, their love can too. I've had more than one true love. What Neil and I had, that was real. But so is what I have with…." She stops abruptly again, cheeks reddening. "I love someone else now, and I know that what I have with them is real too. I know it's the same for you, Regina. Daniel was your first true love, perhaps Robin is your second, and maybe you have a third."

Neither of us talk for a second, and after a minute passes she leans closer. "Regina, listen. Don't let anyone write your story for you. Don't let anyone tell you what you need to do. For the first time in your life, maybe your happiness isn't predicted by some stupid story book. You have the freedom to live the way you want to. Be happy the way you want to be happy. _Write your own happy ending._ "

She stands up, looking down at me with deep eyes. She looks like she wants to say something, but she doesn't. Instead, she gives me one last reassuring smile before walking out the door and leaving me alone at the booth, only my cup of hot chocolate sitting in front of me.

Hell, would you look at that. I ordered it with cinnamon.


	8. Chapter 7

_Two Days Before the Wedding~_

 _Emma's POV~_

The past few days have been tense. I know that it was a horrible decision to bring Hook to the diner. Not only has Regina been completely ignoring me since that night, I also had to break Hook's heart. For a while, I thought about using him as a long-term distraction. I like him well enough, he's handsome and roguishly charming. I think that maybe I could like him, if I put effort into it. But he already _does_ like me, and the worst thing you can put someone through is unrecipitated love. I know that first-hand….. Although sometimes I imagine that I'd be happy with Regina even if she was just pretending to like me.

I'm tormenting myself over everything that has happened this past week when I hear a knock on the door. I jump. Not because it startled me, but because I'm shocked to realize that I know exactly what Regina's knock sounds like. But it can't be….. why would she come here?

My heart jumps into my throat, beating so fast that the poor thing will tire out from exhaustion. _Please heart, please,_ I beg, _slow down. I can't think with you banging like that._

In fact, the only thing I really can think about is the adrenaline pumping through my veins. It tells me to go hide. She's bound to leave in a few minutes….. I could just pretend to not be home.

It's tempting.

That's what I'll do, I decide.

And then the door knocks again.

And I'm suddenly opening it.

 _Damn it. I'm helpless._

"Hello Ms. Swan," God those words. Those three words. She meant nothing more than the literal meaning, and yet I swear I can hear so much passion and want behind them. Damn, what my imagination does sometimes. It seems so real….

I say something, and invite her in, but she shakes her head.

"No, that won't be necessary. I just came by to ask you something."

What does she want to ask me? My head buzzes with little voices that whisper all the things she could ask me, all the little dreams I have about her…. But I don't listen to them. I can't. It hurts too much when those little dreams don't come true.

"Sure. What's bothering you?"

"Well, I know I didn't originally want bridesmaids but….. I'm rethinking my decision."

She looks up at me as if that should be significant.

"Oh," I say. "okay." There's really nothing else to add.

She swallows. "And….. I was wondering….. if…. you'd…. if you'd be the maid of honor?"

There's doubt in her voice, like she's questioning herself. Questioning her decision to ask me. But I can't hear that doubt. All I can hear are the words that are a conformation of our friendship. She asked me to be her maid of honor. God.

"Oh god Regina, of course. I'd be honored."

The doubt etched on her skin melts away.

"But why?" I ask. "I mean, why _me?_ "

"Because," she says. "I can't imagine looking at anyone else but you when I'm walking down the aisle."


	9. Chapter 8

_The Day of the Wedding~_

 _Emma's POV~_

There's only one hour before the wedding. One hour before my world goes tumbling out of control and the woman I love marries someone else.

And only one hour for Regina to finish getting ready. She arrived late, and everyone has been panicking, worrying that she won't be ready in time. But I keep thinking to myself, wouldn't that be wonderful?

With only 60 short minutes left, someone needs to go help her finish getting ready, and since I _am_ the maid of honor, I'm the one that has been chosen to do the job.

The door to her dressing room is cracked open, so I don't bother to knock before I walk in. I go in silently, and she doesn't hear me enter. But God, I wouldn't be surprised if she could hear my heart rate escalate when I see her standing in front of the mirror. Her long hair is pulled into an elegant bun, and a few strands of stray hair cascade down her shoulders. Her dress hugs her curves in all the right places; it shouldn't be legal to look that good. It isn't zipped yet, so her back is left vulnerable. Her skin is as white as paper, her hair as dark as ebony, her lips as red as blood—she is so beautiful and gorgeous it makes my head throb. My mind goes numb, my heart starts racing, and my stomach starts tickling with the wings of tiny butterflies. I'm afraid that if I don't do something soon, I'll end up confessing my feelings to her right then and there, so I force my eyes down and clear my throat to alert her of my presence. She turns around immediately.

"Swan," she says. Bittersweet memories come flooding back to me. It's funny how many thoughts can be packed into one word. There's no such thing as time travel? Then why am I taken back to every single moment she's ever called me that the second she utters the word?

She tries to hide the fact that she's been crying, but I've already seen the tears that stain her perfect cheeks.

"You okay?" I ask her.

She avoids my gaze and looks into the mirror instead. She doesn't answer for several moments, so I walk up close behind her, contemplating whether I should touch her or not. I can't tell if the touch would be taken as reassuring or if she'd suddenly lash out at me, but I decide to rest my hand gently on her shoulder anyway. She turns toward me slightly, as if she's about to rest her chin on my hand. Neither of us speak and I simply look at our reflection in the mirror.

Words can't express the way she's making me feel. She's so beautiful. My mind is completely in her control. No thoughts other than how much I love her and how awe-struck I am by her and how much I just want to touch her swim through my head.

My voice is husky when I finally manage to whisper, "You look absolutely gorgeous." That's an understatement.

She smiles a little, and makes a movement as if she's about to put her hand on top of mine. Changing her mind, she says instead, "Zip me up?"

I go around her, and the force of her beauty close-up takes my breath away. Her entire back is exposed, and the sight of it sends shivers up my arms. ' _You're not into her, you're not into her, you're not into her,'_ I keep saying to myself, but as I work the zipper I almost can't resist the urge to place my lips on her neck and run my hands along her soft, porcelain skin.

When the zipper is finally up, making her curves impossibly more defined, I don't step away like I should. I don't even move my hand away from her back. Instead, I move my hand further down, to her waist, and she responds by turning around to face me.

Our faces are only centimeters apart. We're so close that I can feel her breath on my face. How she always manages to smell like apples mystifies me.

I'm gazing intently at her cherry-red lips, using every fiber of my being to stop myself from kissing her. She's so close, and it would only take me leaning in an inch to taste the lips I've wanted for so long.

I can feel her staring at my lips as well, and all it would take is one swift movement. One step closer, one inch to lean forward, one hand on the back of her neck, and we could be kissing.

But I can't. I can't do that. Not to her, not to me, not to Robin. But maybe if _she_ kissed _me…._ I try to erase the thought. _'Stop it Emma. Not going to happen.'_ But God how I wish it would.

With great effort, we finally both tear our eyes away from the other one's lips, meeting the other one's gaze.

Tears are brimming her eyes again.

"Are you okay?"

She doesn't answer, but instead shakes her head, pursing her lips.

"Regina, what's wrong?" I want to ask her if she's having pre-wedding doubts, but I know that that's only because I want to hear an answer, so I don't.

"Emma….. I'm not sure I—" she stops herself from finishing the thought. Her eyes dart down to the hand I have on her waist. She places her hand on top of it, making chills rush up both my arms. "Emma," she says softly, "There's something I've been wanting to do, for a very long time….. could i….. can I do it? Before I never get another chance?"

I have no idea what she's talking about (probably because her scent and how close we're standing is blurring my thoughts) but I nod anyways.

She looks up at me closely, moving just an inch nearer. Her nose is eclipsing mine and I've never been so close to her before. Her eyes dart down to my lips and I can't breathe when I feel two warm hands cup my face.

Her warm breath drips down my face and neck, making my veins fill with electricity. I can see her lips moving, but she whispers so quietly that I can barely hear her when she says "Emma," softly. And I hardly remember her saying it either, for what happens next is something I only ever dared to hope would happen.

She moves one of her hands to the back of my neck, studying my face once more before she finally pulls me in and crashes her lips into mine. I gasp—first because I'm surprised, second because I've wanted this _so badly_ for _so long,_ and third because it feels so damn good; like rain on desert soil or sunlight spilling over the horizon. After the initial shock wears off, I respond by wrapping my arms around her, pushing our bodies together, kissing her fervently back. I pull her closer, closer, closer, but I can never get her close enough. I can never get enough of the taste of her lips. I can never get enough of the feeling of her warmth. I can never get enough of her.

After a long moment, we pull back, trying to catch our breath.

There's a long pause where we say nothing with words and yet everything with our eyes before she finally breaks the silence by whispering "I'm sorry." She takes my face in her hands again, kisses my cheek, and then runs out of the room.

I can't even tell her that I'm not.


	10. Chapter 9

_Emma's POV~_

I'm running, because running is all I know how to do. I'm running because everything is crashing down around me. I'm running because it's the only way to keep my thoughts from making me crazy.

I love her.

God how I love her.

And the way her lips feel on mine… it's perfect. Every touch only intensifies my feelings for her.

I know that I'm in love with her. There's a connection between us forged by unspoken words. We don't need words, for the words that are silent can be more powerful than the ones that are said aloud.

She has told me she loves me. I was an idiot not to notice before. And I've told her I love her. Never out loud, no never, but silently. Isn't that so much more special? Words are broken. The fire and passion behind them breaks immediately once they leave the throat. But through the eyes, God through the eyes, you can see everything. You can see the want and the passion and the love. The need and the regret and the sorrow. The life. Through the eyes you can see the life of the speaker's emotions.

But for the first time, I've decided that words must be spoken. The things that have been said silently between Regina and I must now be cemented in the truth of speech.

I run, because I feel like everything is going to spill out of me. I have to tell her. Before it's too late. I need her in my life. I can't go on standing back and watching as the only person I've ever loved so unconditionally marries someone else. It's lit up in me as a fire. I can't stand back helplessly anymore. I refuse. And that's why I'm running. I'm running to find her, before it's too late.

"Regina!" I call across the courtyard. The sun has just passed the center of the sky, slowly beginning its evening retreat as afternoon starts creeping in.

"Regina!" my voice is strong and yet weak at the same time. It's desperate. I'm desperate.

The wedding is about to start in twenty minutes inside this cozy little building, but Regina is standing outside in the garden. She sits on a bench that faces the roses, her arms pulled tight around her. She always stands like that, as if she's trying to hold the pieces of her fragile soul together.

"Regina," I say once more.

She whips around and stands up as soon as the word leaves my mouth. God, her beauty astounds me. I stop a few feet away from her, stumbling a little with the effect of her beauty.

"You can't marry Robin."

I expected to lead up to the point carefully, but I hear the words pouring out of my mouth before I can even stop them.

She stares at me for a long time, something glistening in her eyes.


	11. Chapter 10

_Regina's POV~_

I hear the words and they sound like life.

Free, beautiful, desperate, longing.

That what the voice that calls them sounds like.

"Regina," it says.

One time, two times, three times.

And each time is more magical, more pleading, more gorgeous.

I see her blond hair whip around the corner and she stumbles to a stop in front of me.

And I can't breathe. She's so stunningly pretty. Her blonde hair is pulled into a stylish pony tail, and a bright red dress is shaped around her figure. Chills run up my arms as I remember that this is the woman that I kissed; the woman who kissed me back. The woman I love; the woman I'm too scared to love because nothing has ever made me feel this way before.

I stand up from my bench. I found refuge here after our kiss. I'd hope the fresh air would clear my head, but it's still raging with my burning thoughts.

"You can't marry Robin." She says suddenly.

The words are like lightning. Sudden, unexpected, fierce, and beautiful. I've longed to hear them, to hear the reason behind them. And now that I'm about to, the apprehension is rushing up my veins like electricity.

I want to run to her, to pull her into my arms again and tell her that i understand, that I already know. But I can't. Forever the Queen, I have to play it cool.

"Why not?" I say. I want an answer. I want to hear her say it. If she loves me as I doubt she does and yet helplessly need her to, I need to hear her say it.

Her eyes fog over with all the boiling emotions she's feeling. A strand of lovely blonde hair escapes her ponytail and falls across her face, framing its perfection.

"Because you don't love him," she says as the breeze makes her hair dance. Her words full of passion and vigor. "He can't make you happy Regina, because you don't love him. You can't expect someone to give you happiness if you can't give them love in return."

"But Emma," I say breathlessly, "No one can give me happiness." My eyes fill up with tears. "No one loves me."

Emma's whole face burns with disbelief. "You really don't know, do you?"

I stay still, so she lets out a sad laugh, shaking her head.

" _God,"_ she says, more to herself than to me. " _You really don't know."_ Looking up, she smiles softly. "You have no idea how much I love you, do you?"

Her words fill me up with what I've been missing for so long. My broken soul, my bleeding mind, and my dying heart are all healed with her words. My soul is pieced back together, my mind is bandaged, and my heart is pumped full of life.

"You love me?" Now it is my face that is full of disbelief.

"Oh, Regina. Those words had no true meaning until I found you."

She steps closer to me, taking my hands in hers, linking our eyes and pouring everything she has inside of her into me through our gaze.

"I love you," she says. "Madly. I've been in love with you for years. My whole life has consisted of running, but I can't run anymore. I found a reason worth staying."

She cups my face in her hands, forcing me closer. The intensity of happiness that I feel right now is almost unbearable. It's all just too perfect.

"Don't marry him Regina," she pleads. "Not being with you would kill me, but what would be even more painful would be seeing you unhappy. You've been unhappy you're whole life, why would you chain yourself to it once more? I have the key Regina. I can free you. Give me the chance, and I will do my best to give you everything you've ever wanted. I might not be able to do that, but I can sure as hell try."

I let out a teary laugh and a genuine smile. "Oh god Emma, of course you'd be able to. _The only thing I've ever wanted is you."_


	12. Chapter 11

_The Ceremony~_

 _Emma's POV~_

The sun falls gently over the mansion, its white walls glistening and shining.

It all started here.

We met here.

This is where she found out that I was her son's birth mother.

This is where I began my journey as the Savior.

This is where I began unraveling Regina's old hopes for a happy ending and began rebuilding hopes for a new one.

We started to hate each other here, and ended up loving each other here instead.

So this place right here, right now, is where I will marry her.

It's been a year since that first wedding. What a crazy time that had been. Regina had really been going to marry Robin, and I was really going to let her.

Luckily, I'd decided to confess my feelings for her, and I'd been even luckier to learn that she returned them.

We'd rushed to the ceremony, anxious to call it off, only to find out that Robin already had….. we found out later that he had faked the whole thing. Regina had never been his true love. The whole vision Tinker Belle had shown Regina had only been a fake he'd set up himself, desperate to find someone to replace Marion. He'd learned the hard way that no one ever could.

And now, a year later, all wounds healed, he's done us the honor of being the Best Man at our wedding.

We are all lined up at the little alter that's been set up down the path that leads to the front door. Any second, those doors will open to reveal my bride.

We wait expectantly, adrenaline rushing through all our veins.

But as seconds turn to minutes, the adrenaline fades to worry.

Where the hell is she?

Those doors never open.

My phone rings instead.

I look down and see an unfamiliar number.

When I answer it, words I never wanted to hear are spoken.

"Is this a Miss Emma Swan? We are very sorry to inform you that your fiancé, Regina Mills, has been in a tragic car accident…. You might want to make your way to the hospital."


	13. Check out the sequel! :)

Hey everyone! I would just like to let you know that there is a sequel to this story! It is called "Remember You" and is currently posted :) Make sure to go check it out! Love you all! x


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